In bad day

How to Recover From a Bad Day

Whether you had a bad day in school, or a bad day at work, sometimes it is helpful to have a few ways to unwind. Having been through high school drama, bad grades, rejections, bad meetings, and more, I have learned that there are a few things that help me recover from a somewhat negative day. While the following list might help you to recover from a bad day, keep in mind that you have to want to feel better and you have to be willing to let go of the stress and negativity in order to fully feel better. The following list is by no means comprehensive, but is a list of things that I have found have helped me in the past. 

1. Take a warm shower.
Or bath. Whatever floats your metaphorical boat! Taking a warm shower can help you relax tense muscles, destress, and distract you from dwelling on the negativity from the day. If it helps, try to envision yourself physically washing away the stress/negativity of the day. If you've already taken a shower today, take another one! Or just splash some water on your face. These simple, routine actions can help you feel refreshed and prepare you to move on to the next, hopefully positive, step or phase of your day.
2. Indulge in your hobby. 
Whether your hobby is crafting, painting, running, playing video games, or any number of other things, sometimes it helps to channel negative emotions into constructive actions. Hobbies allow us to do what we love, and often times offer a sense of catharsis and relaxation. If nothing else, they distract us by providing us with something that makes us happy. Participating in your hobby can help you to release some energy, take your mind off of whatever thoughts you are dwelling on, and help you feel productive. My hobby, for example, is writing. 
3. Listen to your happy song. 
People have a tendency sometimes to listen to music that reflects their mood. This can be a good thing, but it can also be a bad thing. If you had a rough day and are feeling a bit down, listening to a sad, melancholy song could end up feeding your negative emotions and end up making you feel worse. Instead, try replacing that sad song with an upbeat one, one that holds a lot of happy, nostalgic memories. Positive memories and happy feelings can help to override the negative ones, and an upbeat song can help pump you up like a musical pep talk.
4. Find something positive in the day. 
Even though something not-so-wonderful may have happened, you might be  are probably also able to find something positive that happened. Maybe you were able to see a friend today and share some laughs, maybe the sun is shining outside and it looks beautiful, or maybe you just had a really great cup of coffee that morning. If you can't seem to find even one small positive things today, make a positive moment happen right now. 
5. Remember that not all days are like this
Today is one of many. Don't let one bad day ruin your week, or one bad week ruin your month. Things pass, and this day will pass too. Try to unwind from this one, but remember that you will wake up tomorrow with so many possibilities to have a good day. Today may have been a bad day, but for every bad day, I wish you handfuls of good ones. 
Happy unwinding! :)
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In break-up love relationships

How to Get Over a Break-Up

Although I haven't gone through a break up recently, I feel as though it is important to share my thoughts about getting over a break up with girls who may be going through one right now. These steps to getting over a break up have helped me in the past and I can only hope that they can help others too. I am by no means a love professional, and I absolutely do not profess to be an expert on break ups and relationships, but sometimes when you're going through a break up, it's helpful to hear success stories of women who have been through it before and have come out stronger on the other end. So, without further ado, I present to you my 5 steps to getting over a break up:

1. Let it all out. All at once.* I think (and have experienced first hand) that crying, being upset, and venting is a crucial part of getting over a beak up; it's cathartic. While some guys (and probably some girls) may be fine just drinking a beer and playing video games to get over a break up, some just want to scream into a pillow and eat raw cookie dough with their girlfriends. Whether your catharsis comes from eating a pint of rocky road ice cream, venting to your best friends, having a rom com marathon, throwing darts at a picture of your ex-- go for it. An important part of moving on is getting all the anger and sadness out of your system. Don't take too long in this stage though, (that's why I said *all at once), because then it's considered dwelling and obsessing, and that is definitely not good (or healthy)! Besides, you shouldn't let your ex take away any more of your happiness. Quite frankly, the more time you spend crying over your ex, the less time you have to be happy. Always choose happiness because you deserve to be happy, and no one in the world (especially someone who has broken your heart) is worth your happiness.

2. Cleanse. You can't get over a break up if you don't cleanse yourself of all the reminders! It is likely that there will be anger and tears throughout this process, too-- that's okay, but don't let those feelings get the best of you and delay your cleansing period. The best way to do it is to dive straight in and to not look back. Rip off that band-aid. Tear up the love letters, delete the photos, donate the stuffed animals, send back the sweatshirts. You don't necessarily have to completely erase this person from your entire life (like in Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, which by the way is a good suggestion for a movie to watch in step 1, but I digress), but the most crucial part of this step is that you must must MUST remove all the daily reminders of your ex (you know what I'm talking about: the Facebook thread, the cellphone background, the neckless you were given on your anniversary...) from your daily life and your moving on process. If you're constantly being reminded of the past, how are you supposed to move on to the future?

3. Realize that there is a reason that the break up happened. If you are the one that was broken up with, just remember that it was a decision that was made that you could not help and can not change. I know that often times there is a tendency to ask yourself, "what did I do wrong?" but relationships are not just a one way street. It's not that you did something wrong, it's that the relationship itself was wrong. If it felt wrong to the other person (or to you, if you were the one doing the breaking up) then something about that relationship was clearly not right. Be honest with yourself: would you really want to be with someone who felt that way about your relationship? Would you be happy in a relationship that didn't feel right to one (or both) of you? If you don't embrace the fact that you wouldn't, and you dwell on trying to make everything right again, you are simply wasting your time, energy, and happiness on someone who doesn't feel the same way about you. Another important thing to remember is that you can't force someone to re-fall in love with you. You can't just erase a gut feeling. Those feelings will still be there and they are there for a reason. They are meant to be telling you something, and now is the time to really listen. In order to save yourself from the pain of staying in a relationship that isn't right, it's time to move on from that relationship and realize that one day you will find the relationship that is.

4. Think of the clichés. I'm sure at this point in getting over a break up you are sick of hearing clichés, but they became clichés for a reason, right? If they've withstood the test of time, there must be some truth in them. There are other fish in the sea. There are, and this break up is only bringing you closer to finding the right one because . . . everything happens for a reason. This relationship has ended so that an even better one can happen. You know, when one door closes, another one opens . . . am I getting carried away here? Haha, probably. The point that I am trying to make is that there is a reason that this happened, and that is not something you can just ignore. Those clichés are not just there to annoy you, but to remind you of what others have learned after their break ups. This particular relationship may not  have worked out for you, but that absolutely does not mean that you won't find one that ultimately will. And that is exactly what all those annoying clichés are trying to tell you.

5. Learn to love yourself. It's very hard to love someone else when you haven't learned to love yourself. Be proud of who you are, be confident in your decisions, and realize that you are perfectly productive and powerful all on your own. You are so much stronger than you think, and, believe it or not, this break up has only made you stronger. You've learned lessons from this past relationship: lessons that can only benefit you in the future. Sure, maybe you've learned a lot about your ex, but you've also learned a lot about yourself. Take all of those lessons and use them to propel you forward and to help make your decisions in the future. Don't think of yourself as a "lonely single girl" but instead see yourself as a powerful woman with lots of options. Exploit those options. Be yourself. And go back into the world with your newfound strength. You've been through a lot, and you're stronger and more knowledgeable now. Be proud of yourself and what you've accomplished, and don't forget to love yourself.

** Disclaimer: this post was originally written on my personal blog in 2013. I do not claim to be an expert in break-ups and relationships, but these are some tips that have helped me in the past.

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In money tip

How Much To Tip

Tipping was something that always confused me. I was never completely sure how much I was supposed to leave for a tip, and how it differed for different services. To make it easier for those who may be confused like me, I have compiled a list of percentages/dollar amounts that are appropriate for various tips. This list is by no means comprehensive, as there are several other services for which tipping is appropriate, but it includes several key categories that I find most helpful.
  • Waiter: typically between 17% - 20%, and usually never below 15%
  • Food Delivery Person: between $2 - $5
  • Hair Dresser/Barber: 15% - 20%
  • Shampoo Person: $2
  • Manicurist: 15% 
  • Bar Tender: $1 - $2 is fine if you're having one drink. If you rack up a big tab, though, 15% - 20% is probably more appropriate.
  • Cab Driver: I find that this one of the categories that varies the most from person to person. Generally, I think that if your cab fare is under $10, rounding up to the nearest dollar or tipping $1 is fine. If the bill is over $10, most people go with 15% on average. 
  • Valet: $1 - $2
  • Hotel Bellhop: $1 per bag, but it is usually customary to tip $2 for one bag.
  • Handyman/Repairman/Home Service Providers: no tip.
  • Tow Truck Services: $5 - $10
Tipping amounts always vary from person to person. This list is not meant to set strict limitations on tipping, but is meant to serve as a guideline for those who aren't sure. Generally, people tip higher for larger bills and/or great service, and lower for smaller bills and/or poor service. Just use your judgement and use the above amounts as guidelines, and you should be fine!
Happy tipping! :)

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In credit cards debit cards money

Why Credit Cards Are Important

I got my first debit card in high school, and I got my first credit card when I was 22. When I was younger, I told myself that I would never even bother getting a credit card. Ever. That way, I wouldn't have to worry about credit card debt like the people I saw in TV commercials. Back then, I didn't realize that there are several reasons why one might actually need to get a credit card (and why I actually did end up getting a credit card of my own).

Now, before I start talking about what I know about credit cards, I feel the need to mention that my knowledge of credit cards is far from comprehensive. There are, however, a few things that I know now about credit cards that I wish I had known earlier.

Let's start with the basics of a debit card. A debit card, the first card I got, is a card that allows you to draw money straight from your bank account. When you pay with a debit card, you complete your transactions using money that comes directly from your account. With a debit card, you spend the money that you already have without having to worry about paying anyone back.(Just be careful about spending more than you have).

A credit card, on the other hand, is a card that allows you to borrow money from the bank under the premise that you will pay the bank back when your bill is due. You typically have to pay your bill about once a month, but this varies from bank to bank and it is very important to be aware when your bills are due otherwise this will negatively impact your credit score.

This brings me to my next point: the importance of a credit score. Having a good record of borrowing money and paying your bills on time is extremely important when you need to get a loan (for your education, for a car, for an apartment, for a house, or for whatever you may need a loan for). A credit score, which is measured by a number between 300 to 850, is a number that measures your credibility/trustworthiness to lenders that provide you loans. This number tells lenders how reliable and consistent you are with your credit. Using a credit card regularly and paying your bills on time is a great way to build your credit score. (It is important to note that this is not the only contributing factor to your credit score. Other factors may include your number of open credit accounts, whether or not you are in debt, etc.)

Credit cards are also important because some places require that you use one. Credit cards are sometimes required to make hotel reservations, get car rentals, and make online purchases.

If you are in an emergency situation and don't have enough money on you, a credit card can be helpful. Say for example, you are traveling, your flight was cancelled, and you needed to make a last minute hotel reservation or have to rent a car. If you don't have enough cash on you to do so, you can pay for the hotel room or car with your credit card, and simply pay your credit card bill when it's due.

Certain credit cards have rewards/benefits that come with them, like Frequent Flyer Miles, high rate of cash back, redeemable points, etc. Benefits vary depending on the card, but many of these benefits can be useful depending on your lifestyle and needs.

These are a few reasons (but by no means all) why credit cards are important, and are many of the things that I did not take into account when I promised my 15 year-old-self that I would never get one.

As long as you play your cards right (pun intended), having a credit card can be beneficial. If you pay your bills on time and are responsible with your credit, you should have no problem reaping the benefits of credit cards :)

Do you have anything else to add? Any helpful resources? Write them in the comments below!

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